Happy Fall, Ya'll!

It's been a while since I've had the opportunity to write about how things are progressing in this pregnancy and life. Since the end of August, I have not had a single free weekend due to insanely busy activities and therefore the blogging has decreased. Over the past few months,  we have had multiple weddings in various locations, an anatomy scan, a baby shower in Lewisburg, a lot of growth in the stomach, a birthday party in Charleston, the purchasing of maternity clothes, a day fishing trip, the creation of baby registries and even a Bachlorette weekend. Richard and I are counting down the next 2 weeks in anticipation of when we will gain our weekends back until the baby arrives (although his next rotation will mean that he works weekends once again). 

The Anatomy Scan was on August 26th and it was amazing to see the growth/development from our initial ultrasound to this particular scan. Everything looked textbook on the baby and although he or she did NOT want to be disturbed, we were still able to see how perfect our little miracle is already. We remained strong and both turned our heads when the tech looked at the gender. We are so excited for the big moment in January when we find out Boy or Girl! From the moment I found out that I was pregnant, I thought that it was girl. After seeing the 3D ultrasound picture,  my opinion changed to boy.  Today, months after the ultrasound, I am back to thinking girl.  Whenever Richard and I talk gender he never has thoughts or opinions. Regardless of the baby being a boy or girl, the one thing that we care about is the health of the baby. We want a healthy baby. Please continue to have good thoughts and pray for everything to remain healthy.

Our Nursery is still a work in progress... All of the painting is done and as of recently, the crib is put together.  Richard was so excited to be able to put the crib together that the day it arrived, he put it together. We are attempting a travel/world theme for the nursery and are excited to see how it progresses over the final months of the pregnancy.

At the beginning of October, I flew to Lewisburg for a wonderful baby shower. It was a small group of  women and included some of the most important people in my life. Brooke &  Justin flew up from New Orleans to surprise me, Jerri, Liz and Mel came from Buffalo/NYC and my Aunt Jan and Uncle Bob drove up from TN. It was wonderful to celebrate Baby O'Neal with so many important people I was overwhelmed by the the amount of love and support given by everyone towards Baby O'Neal (and us).  All the people who traveled far for the shower, everyone who came the shower and brought gifts for the baby touched my heart in ways I will never be able to express. Our house is filling up with baby items and I love that each gift comes from such wonderful people.  Soon we will have another one in Rock Hill surrounded by Richard's family and friends. It will be a beautiful event and I am positive that once again, the outpour of love will be amazing.

For the first work free weekend in Richard's schedule for a while, we attended my best friends wedding. It was a beautiful ceremony and an awesome reception.  I loved being able to stand next to her as she married her soul mate. Additionally, it was so nice to have Richard at my side looking extremely handsome. When we left the reception, we headed up to TN for our "babymoon" day excursion. We went fishing on the Watauga with a guide and had a blast. The trout weren't biting very much, but spending a whole day with Richard was wonderful. I can't begin to tell you the last time we did that.

At my bffs wedding

Sometimes I think back to the days of our long distance relationship and I see numerous parallels to that time and our current life in residency.  The parallels in both phases of our relationship are these: Weekends together are sacred and rare, there is no way every task you have to accomplish will get finished, get used to independence because often we are both off doing separate activities in different cities and keeping your phone charged is essential because texting/phone conversations sometimes is the only way we get to check in with one another.

Being married to a resident and starting a family with one is no easy task. For example, while most women have their husbands along for each prenatal doctors visit, Richard has only been able to attend 2.  Richard will only have 1 week off (including Labor & Delivery) before he returns to work. Should the baby come late, the days in which he'll have "normal"  work hours will diminish (rotations change early February and again he'll be working 90 hrs a week).  I am mentally trying to prepare myself for the challenges associated with adjusting to life with new baby but  also how life with a resident husband and a new baby will be. I will admit that the future terrifies me and I pray everyday that I have the strength inside to do a lot of solo parenting while Richard finishes his training. I know so many women have done this before and are currently do this, but these future hurdles more than anything related to pregnancy or childbirth gives me anxiety.

Luka loving on the baby while the baby kicks him

Being in the 3rd trimester, we are now in the home stretch! Baby moves constantly these days and loves to have dance parties all night long. I am struggling to find a sleeping position that keeps the both of us comfortable. I can tell you that already, this baby is demanding and likes to makes him or herself known (especially at 2 am). We're anxious for January, but also hoping time slows down a little but so that we can finish everything in preparation for the baby. I am now seeing my OBGYN every 2 weeks and eventually I'll be going weekly. By the time the holidays get here, my travel will be restricted so that "in-case" something happens that I will be near the hospital.  It is hard to believe that January is just around the corner and soon we will be able to love on this little one.

I cannot thank those of you who regularly check in with me enough. It is so encouraging to get a message or email that asks how I'm doing or how baby is doing.  It truly means the world that people think about me and this adventure enough to reach out. As always, thank you for your support, your encouragement and your well wishes. Time is flying by and January will be here in just a few months. Until then we are awaiting the arrival of our niece or nephew who is due in the next few weeks, Richard will begin Critical Care (one of the hardest rotations during residency),  we are trying to finish all baby related projects and still enjoy some time with one another. Hopefully it won't be so long before the next update, but who knows. As always, thanks for reading and supporting us on this adventure!

O'Neal News

Well after a bit of an absence from the blogging scene, I'm stepping back into it!  Since my last post in May, lots of things have changed. About a week after my last post Richard and I found out that in January, we will become parents! First trimester has now come and gone. Overall, it was easy but the main struggle was the fatigue. There were a few weeks when I was so exhausted that I'd sleep every second that I could. I'd try to sneak home early and sleep until dinner time and then I would force Richard to go to bed early (really I'd fall asleep and he'd watch tv). No morning sickness though -- hallelujah!

10 week ultrasound 

We had our first doctors appointment/ultrasound at 10 weeks. It may be the most incredible thing that I have ever seen/heard.  What a life altering moment to hear your baby's heart beat and see the little growing human on the tv. I immediately cried and Richard said that he was just so in "awe" that he didn't know how to react. USCSOM teaches its students extensively on ultrasound (it's something they pride themselves on) and so Richard has spent a lot of time seeing similar ultrasounds. It amazed me to see how speechless and awe struck he was, but I guess that it is very different when it's your child.

Both of our families are very excited about this addition.  We told them each pretty early into the pregnancy, so I imagine both sides are thrilled to be able to talk with everyone about it now!  We are beginning to do the necessary prep work for the house and financially. Richard has been booted from his big closet and is moving excess items out of the 3rd bedroom (If anyone needs a dresser and bedside table let me know). We are starting to put together the list of items that we'll buy or register for but it's amazing how much stuff there truly is. Weeding through the excess to have the basic list of essentials is a huge task.

Richard and his silly face

This week I decided to be proactive in searching for a daycare because I had heard things in Greenville fill up quickly. Well thank goodness I did! The hospital daycare has a waiting list of over a year.. I called another one who very nicely told me "we hope to have you placed in a classroom by the 2 year old age group". WHAT?! That phone call proved to me what sort of insanity is occurring in the Greenville infant daycare system. After frantically emailing and calling places, I found the last spot in a daycare beginning May 2016. My baby has barely had its gender developed and I am already late on setting up a daycare option?! So the lessons that I'm sharing with my local friends are 1.) Open an infant daycare and you'll have plenty of business and 2.) if you are even entertaining the thought of having children (even 2 yrs out) that you should look into daycare.  I am just thankful that we found a great place with a wonderful reputation in the community and that although it starts in May and not April (when maternity leave would end should everything go as planned) that we have a plan. We will be on the hunt for a good nanny of some sort for the 1st few weeks until May 1st when the space becomes available.


It is amazing how immediately after seeing that "positive" come up on a pregnancy test how your mind changes and the focus shifts. We still have many months to go but regardless of the amount time we have, I don't think we will ever be fully prepared.  Sometime next month we will have our anatomy scan and will get another glimpse at the baby. This is normally when gender would be determined, but we are going "old school" and will find out around January 16th when she or he arrives.  Until then I am thankful for the ease of everything so far and continue to pray that everything stays that way as this pregnancy progresses. It's hard to believe I'm  already 15 weeks on Saturday.


We cannot say enough about how overwhelmed we were by the countless people who liked and commented on the Facebook post.  406 likes and 122 comments- WOW. Thank you, thank you! We are feeling love from people all over the world and cannot say enough about how much it means to us. Thank you for supporting us, for loving us, for already loving our little one and for starting this new phase of life with us! We are excited about everything pregnancy and parenthood have in store for us!

P.S. We've done a lot of things since the last entry and I will soon write another update sharing pictures from some of the trips/outings that we've had in the past 3 months.

Lets get together.. yeah yeah yeah

“Time is the most valuable thing a man can spend "  

                                                        -Theophrastus

April came, went and already we are speeding through May. Can anyone make time stand still for little bit? These months where Richard is present and accounted for are so awesome. We get to have dinner together as much as we want, we get to lay in the hammock, piddle in the yard, watch Game Of Thrones or snuggle with our puppy— TOGETHER! 

Kentucky Derby Party May 2 2015

Medical School Graduation 2014

Time is such a precious gift. The time we spend together during “good months”  is great but sometimes it is exhausting. Not because we spend too much time together but because we are constantly going and doing. His months of electives are so rare that we feel the need to visit with people, go out and do things in Greenville or attend family functions and because of that, our quality time together suffers. We didn’t have a single weekend together last month that we weren’t “overbooked” with events.  This is a topic of conversation that Richard and I have recently been talking a lot about… we pride ourselves on being available to spend time with important people in our lives but are trying to learn how to be a little more selfish about our time together.  Learning how to say “no” is difficult and we both have guilt about it when we actually do say it.  In a perfect world, there would be more elective months with free weekends, but at least for the next few years that is not an option. So learning how to not overbook ourselves is our new goal together. We  love and appreciate all of the wonderful people in our support system, but we need to continue to grow together during this journey. 

Luka

Believe it or not, intern year is rapidly coming to a close.  This week last year, we were celebrating his medical school graduation. It amazes me that a full year has come and gone already.  Beginning
in July, Richard will no longer be the low man on the totem pole. He will have more responsibilities, will be held more accountable for things (don’t know how that’s possible but it is) and his hours will be different than intern year. I’m not banking on it being any better than intern year but I don’t think it could be any worse.  In this life, we have to take the positives and run with them.

Richard cutting my Shanmama's yard
in Denver at the end of April

We are still waiting for his schedule for the next year of residency. Every day (jokingly) I ask him, “do you have your schedule yet”? Every day he answers “no”. This has been a frustrating experience because there are things going on in the next year in our life that we are trying to attend (together)… we’ve got weddings and family things that he would like to attend and we still have no clue.  We have a big wedding in July and now we are within the required 60 day time frame for requesting off (should it be an elective month) and he has no clue if it’s even a possibility.   I am unsure of how many electives he'll have in the upcoming year, but I hope there are lots of them and that they are spread out. It is amazing how much of a difference a "good month" aka elective rotation can make for Richard, for me and for us. I love seeing him smile, laugh and just enjoy his outside of the hospital life. Richard does love his 90 hour a week months in the hospital and he learns so much during that time, but sometimes we need a respite for rejuvenation purposes.

Richard wearing his birthday bow tie from
his grandma!

At the end of May Richard will be taking his Step 3 Board Exams. Every night he spends some time going over questions and trying to prepare for this big important exam. Should Richard have a desire to do a fellowship, doing well on this test is essential.  Please keep him in your thoughts/prayers this month as he prepares and sits for this 2 days exam.  At the end of the month we head to Disney for the final weekend of this elective month. June 1st begins a busy month and immediately jumps into him staying at the hospital for nights. Guess Luka will be getting used to the bed again!


As always, thank you for following us on this adventure. Richard loves his work at GHS and as his wife it brings me so much joy to know that he is pursuing a career that makes him happy. Thank you for tolerating the unknown of what each month will bring and for remaining unwavering in your support. 

"A Social Gathering"

 “There’s not a word yet for old friends who’ve just met” - Jim Henson

Birthday Boy

As many of you know. Richard's birthday is Saturday the 18th and as I was considering what to do for his birthday, I really struggled. What do you get for a guy who doesn't have a lot of free time for hobbies? For a guy who hasn't expressed a desire for any gifts? For a guy whose schedule wouldn't permit an excursion or outing?  Richard very rarely gets any opportunity to sit, laugh, visit and enjoy himself with friends. He struggles with working on his friendships and relationships because of his schedule limitations and that has been one of our 2015 resolutions (both individually and as a couple). So, I threw him a birthday party or as he called it "A Social Gathering".

 We cooked out, had a few yard games, we laughed, had a fire with smores  (people burned their HIPAA documents) and we truly just enjoyed ourselves. It was so fun to see Richard carrying on with some of the best people we know. 

While we've lived in Greenville and over the past year, we have met so many wonderful people. These are the type of people who you've just met and there isn't any sort of awkward "get to know you period". You enjoy the same things, you are in similar phases of life, you come from relatable backgrounds and for some reason it just works. You click. While some of these relationships are still new and growing, we feel lucky to have met them and look forward to many more memories.

Wonderful friends!

Ryan & Craig (Med Peds Residents)

We also had a few old friends that were there too. I made a point to invite my favorite Wofford Terriers. Blake and Jonathan (Richard's buddies from college who were in our wedding) came up for the weekend. Being around the three of them reminds me so much of the time spent at Wofford. They laugh and carry on just like they used to and despite the craziness of all of our lives, they are such great friends to one another. These are two of my absolute favorite guys in the world and I love being with them (almost as much as Richard does). It's so fun to see how things have changed in our lives. Jonathan is working on a PhD at University of Georgia and Blake is about to graduate from USC School of Medicine. We are so lucky to have these great guys in our lives and savor the limited time we get as a group.

Richard's 21st birthday

Richard's 27th birthday

As we continue to celebrate his birthday week, we will be playing trivia a couple nights this week with some awesome people and on Friday we are headed to Rock Hill to visit with family.  It's hard to believe that in 2009, I helped Richard celebrate his 21st birthday and this week he will celebrate his 27th! It's amazing how time flies and things in life change.

Happy Birthday to Doctor O'Neal! 

February: The Wintery blur

Spring is finally beginning to show its beautiful face here in Greenville. After a cold and occasionally snowy winter, there are signs all around us that it is almost over.  February was a blur of a month and March is quickly passing us by.  Richard was on a geriatric rotation for the month of February and after a few rough months with very little quality time together, we were able to enjoy time with one another (and very often many friends/family). 

 Richard’s first free weekend of the month we had my parents, my aunt & uncle plus some hilarious friends come visit for a fun weekend.  We saw Wicked and ate some wonderful food around town. The following weekend, my bff from childhood came for a quick weekend and we got to see Jason Mraz in concert at the Peace Center.  Poor Richard came down with an awful stomach bug just as Brooke was leaving. It was pitiful to see him so sick but thankfully it was only a 36 hour bug and before I knew it he was requesting a hotdog for lunch! The next weekend we headed to Rock Hill for a visit with Richard’s family where we got to spend good quality time with all of the grandparents, his aunt and uncle, his brother Rob and of course his parents.  Our final weekend we got to spend some good time with one another but yet again we were busy.

The month flew by so quickly and we honestly only had 1 day of just us working in the yard/ doing nothing but being able to spend time with important people was worth everything! Richard’s elective rotations are so few and far between that when he has weekends free we feel the need to go see and visit with people we never have the opportunity to check in with otherwise. As of Monday (3/9) the 3:45 am alarm clock is once again going off and Richard heads into the hospital for long days. This month he will have 1 day off a week (all week days this month) and will be working roughly 80 hours a week. As he kissed me goodbye Monday morning, I jokingly said “see you next month” but there is some truth to the statement.  Luckily this rotation isn’t nearly as bad as some of the others that he has had and we will be able to enjoy dinners together at night. 

In this past rotation we both made an effort to reach out and get involved more with the church that we attend. We attended a community group (week night bible study/ Sunday school class) and met a lot of wonderful people. I've also joined a group of women whose husbands are also physicians. We've got a spectrum of ages from resident wives to women who are seasoned veterans in this life style. It's been a wonderful support and has been very insightful about so many topics. I've enjoyed meeting a few of the other resident spouses and developing friendships with these awesome women. It has been very rewarding for both us to get involved in various groups and it has made use feel more connected to Greenville in an entirely different way. 

We absolutely loved having so many people come visit us in February and hope that this trend will continue throughout 2015.  Richard will finish this next bad month in time for his birthday and then we'll have back to back elective rotations in April and May! Thank you for those of you who support us, call to check in on us, send us letters, who love us and remain constants in our lives. We could not get through this difficult intern year without you.